The Merchant vs The Happy Mask Salesman | |
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Battle information | |
Release date | February 21, 2013 |
Number | 7 |
Views | 16,000+ |
Length | 2:25 |
Timeline | |
Previous | Tom Anderson vs Mark Zuckerberg |
Next | Harry Potter vs Percy Jackson |
Other information | |
Actors | Zander Kanack Justin Buckner LazySundayPaper |
Rappers | |
Cameos | Zombie |
Location(s) | The Moon Castle Roof |
The Merchant vs The Happy Mask Salesman is the seventh installment of Epic Rap Battle Parodies. It features Legend of Zelda shopkeeper and mask salesman, The Happy Mask Salesman, battling Resident Evil 4 shopkeeper, The Merchant, to see who is the better creepy salesman. It was released February 21, 2013.
Cast[]
- Zander Kanack as The Happy Mask Salesman
- Justin Buckner as The Merchant
- LazySundayPaper as Zombie
Lyrics[]
The Happy Mask Salesman:[]
Oh hi, 72 hours remain before I kick your ass to shame.
I'm telling ya, you're gonna shit yourself when you see me in-game.
Alright stranger, we ain't gonna buy your herbs.
Let the clock tick down, then the moon will kick you off my turf.
You should not have done that, I made BEN drown,
Remove that dumb bandana so I can laugh at that frown.
You sound like a 50-year-old guy who smoked a lot.
Explain to me how you feel when Leon walks past your shop.
The Merchant:[]
Hello stranger, you've got your facts flipped.
Tell me why your pedophillic ass has to scare those little kids.
Don't look at me with that stupid grin, you creepy damn clown.
The reason I wear this bandana is so I don't see your ass in Clock Town.
I sell all my shit, you're just a loan shark.
At least when I wanna sell something, stranger, the price has a decent mark.
The moon doesn't wanna see your ass so he crushed your town with all his might,
Me kick your ass? Ah! I'll buy at a high price!
The Happy Mask Salesman:[]
I once heard the story of The Merchant who cried bankrupt,
Did Umbrella get to you, or did you think you actually won?
I'll light the blue torches, sell everything in your shop.
Sorry, Merchant, you lose, just PLEASE STOP.
The Merchant:[]
Got a lot of good things on sale stranger, your victory isn't one.
What are you buyin'? Psyche! I'd never let you be a customer, son.
24 hours remain? Better get your shit and fly.
Want another ass beating? Ha! Come back anytime.
Poll[]
Trivia[]
General[]
- This is the first battle where Nathan Provost doesn't rap.
- This battle is also the first where Nathan didn't appear at all.
- BEN makes an appearance in this rap battle before Slenderman vs Jeff The Killer.
- This is the third rap battle to feature two video-game characters against each other. The first being Vault Boy vs Cole Phelps and the second being Niko Bellic vs John Marston.
- This is the first battle where LazySundayPaper appears, although the first time he raps was as Steve
Production[]
- to be added
References[]
- to be added
References[]
Season 1 | Vault Boy vs Cole Phelps • Mozart vs Skrillex • John Marston vs Niko Bellic • Puff Puff vs Steve Smith • Harry Styles vs Paul McCartney • Tom Anderson vs Mark Zuckerberg • The Merchant vs The Happy Mask Salesman • Harry Potter vs Percy Jackson • Steve vs Joe • Slender Man vs Enderman • Tony Montana vs Al Capone • Jack the Ripper vs Jeff the Killer • Tom Sawyer vs Huckleberry Finn |
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